KiKi's LAIR

You and I, dear reader would both agree that a lot has happened in our lives already this year and we're just about getting done with the first half of it. I for one haven't been exactly reaching the marks I set for myself this year and it gets so frustrating when I look at how much is yet to be done that I want to just throw 'it' all away and just settle for whatever happens. The case might be the same for some of y'all. If you do not happen to belong to this category, well, congratulations! But I'd also have you know that there is always a better way to doing stuff and living life, just so you don't settle for whatever wonderful position you might find yourself in at the moment. So, first things first, what does it actually mean to 'Settle'? The meaning of the word varies over a wide range of definitions but in the context of this article it means, "To become fixed or permanent; to become stationary; to establish one's self or itself;...

In my previous article, I mentioned quite a number of steps one could take towards the coming year in order to make it a successful and rewarding one. And there are other things I'd also want to share with you in that aspect. They might be things you already know but didn't think were important but I tell you they'd go a long way in making your year worth it. BE POSITIVE Positivity is just like a vibe. It emanates from people unconsciously. And this is one of our major goals in the lair, to exude positive vibes to those around us and on this platform. Everyone wants to be around optimistic people. Those with a pessimistic view always have a gloomy outlook on life. Being positive draws people to you and increases your chances of meeting strategic people. Networking is very essential as no man is an island. So then, how can you be positive? Positive confessions.  Always make positive confessions even in the face of negative circumstances. It might not be easy bu...

The year is gradually drawing to a close and soon a new year will come knocking at your door again. It would make sense to prepare for its coming so you won't be caught unawares. If 2017 didn't go well for you, now is the time to count your losses and move on. Don't wait for the new year to do that, it could lower your morale by 80%.  If it went just as you planned, kudos! But remember, there's always more, there's always higher ground to climb and there's always a better wayway to doing things so don't rest on your oars.  The purpose of this article is to prepare you for 2018, so much that the year itself will meet you ready and waiting at the door to welcome it. Firstly, REFOCUS YOUR VISION. This will help you set the proper goals. Sometimes, disappointments can hit you so hard you begin to wonder if your dreams are actually not too big for you. Maybe they are, but then isn't that why its called a 'dream'? And your vision is to mak...

I had always heard of Santa Claus and the image I had of Him was a stout fat man dressed in red carrying a sack of gifts and entering through the chimney. Well, since we didn't have any chimney, I always wondered where he'd come in through if he ever visited my house. A day before Christmas when I was quite younger, mom said to get ready, we'd be going to see Santa. In my little mind, the image I had was the one I expected we were going to see. I was so excited, I told everyone who cared to listen, everyone literally, I mean even the mallam on my street that I was going to see Santa. Whether they understood what I was saying or not, I was just too excited to care. Finally morning came, after a long night, longer than usual or not probably cause I was too excited to sleep well. It was actually a Christmas party and other kids were there as well. Eventually, we stood on the line waiting our turn to see Santa. From afar, he looked slimmer than usual, did he lose weight? I w...

We are almost that time of the year when we celebrate the birth of our saviour, Jesus Christ. It's usually a season of love and sharing that just seems to bring out the good and loving side of everyone. But one striking fact is that sometimes we get carried away with planning and celebrations that we forget the actual celebrant, the main reason for the season. Everyone of us has a birthday and on that day we get gifts, wishes, calls and text messages from loved ones. That day just seems to be basically about us. When it comes to Christmas, I believe the same should apply. If the celebrant is having his party in church, well, what are you doing at home? If you're exchanging gifts with everyone else, what about the celebrant? Imagine you hosted a birthday party in your house and everyone came with gifts for each other except you, the celebrant...how would you feel? Over the years, this has been the case for Jesus. Of course, no material thing could be used to quantify the va...

There comes a time in our walk with God when we all eventually have to drop our Isaac. Our 'Isaac' in reference to the biblical perspective is something very precious to us, so precious that we feel we cannot do without. Mine was a relationship, with a person from whom I'd tried to derive my personality from and idolize unknowingly. The time had come and I tried to evade it just as always. But then again, knowing fully well that I'd get stuck at that level of my life if I couldn't let go, the battle in my mind started. With every wall of resistance I built, his word came like a bulldozer knocking it down. Until finally, I let go. I was so afraid, afraid of loneliness, of the unknown, of the future, that I wouldn't and couldn't make it on my own. Looking back now, we're both glad I did and here I am blazing my own trail, gradually learning to enjoy my own company, embracing wholeness, understanding my role in a bigger picture, impacting my world even...

Just like this picture, we'd want our lives to be prim and proper. But fortunately it doesn't always turn out that way. Why fortunately? Well, perhaps, there's a possibility that we would sink into a routine, running around in circles, never going back but yet never moving forward. Perhaps, there would be no aspirations, no dreams, no hope, and what is a man without hope? Dead. Perhaps, we would then rest on our oars and pride in the fact that we made it happen all by ourselves. This is seemingly possible as man has always tried to play god, most times to his detriment. Maybe the problems, the challenges, the bills, come so that in the process of dealing with them we bump into our purpose, our reason for being created, our existence. Perhaps they come that we may realize the endless possibilities of faith, increasing by each victory. Perhaps, the untidiness of a partner or the unruliness of a family member would teach us to love even when we do not feel like it. Perh...

Ever wondered what the statement, "All you need to succeed lies within you" means? Well, its not just some quote someone invented to make you feel better. Just before you were put in your mother's womb, God deposited certain things in you. Your mother might not have known but she was not just pregnant with you, she was pregnant with greatness. This has nothing to do with the circumstances surrounding your birth. It doesn't matter if you might have perceived that you were unwanted. You came into earth loaded with gifts, talents, potentials, creativity. But with all the issues and forces of life we battle with, most times we forget. And because you're not ready to fight, we settle for less, for mediocrity and join to celebrate those who were able to harness the potential in them. We forget what was embedded in us. No one was created to live this life and leave without leaving a mark, without others knowing you were here. No! Those gifts and talents were put in y...

How do you see you? What do you think of yourself in your heart? What picture do you have of yourself in your mind's eye? The answer to these questions determine to a large extent what your life turns out to be like. It affects everything that concerns you and this is why having a good picture of yourself is necessary. You can never outperform the picture you have of yourself. There'll always be a synergy between what image is on the inside and the action produced outside. Firstly, your picture of you determines your relationships. Like begets like, and we unconsciously attract people like us. The people around you paint the picture you have of yourself. If you could at this very moment sweep through your friends list in your mind, you would find out that you chose them because there was some sort of bonding between you two which resonated from your inside. And these relationship have at some point influenced certain decisions you've made in life whether good or bad. Ever...

He walked faster and faster by the second and I was almost out of breath trying to keep up and then he tried to break into a run but unfortunately for him, a car veered out of nowhere and narrowly missed hitting him. My God was indeed alive, you see I had been paired with this guy for change, he had a 500hundred naira note which consisted of my 400hundred and his 100 hundred naira. Now you know why he wanted to run away. As he stopped, I held him by the belt, this was no time for too much English, "Oga, abeg gimme the money. I wan buy card." He looked at me sheepishly and handed the money. This and many other experiences, all of which I cannot share at once, has made up my story. I haven't been to many states in this country but I have lived in Lagos for about 14years the greater part of which I always at school, boarding that is, or inside the house which later earned me the name, "Omo get inside", a term in the south western part of Nigeria used to describe ...

Sometimes at 2am, am scribbling away with my pen. I've never been able to fully adjust to the typing procedure. I do like the old fashioned way quite much, maybe it's cause I like to bask in the euphoria of having a writing like mine. Those times, my creativity antenna is at alert as a thousand and one words keep popping up in my head, some forming thoughts that I recreate on paper, some giving only phrases that become my titles or themes, some trying to stand independent but not for long as I colonize them with other words to form my articles. Sometimes at 2am, why 2am you ask, cause it's my favorite time of the day, I lay on my bed staring at my ceiling and asking myself random questions, thoughts of the previous day rummaging through my mind, wondering what the future holds, turning my life vision over and over because you see, that is one thing a man must never lose sight of. Sometimes at 2am, I pray. With an ear piece plugged in and a playlist of some Nathaniel Bass...

In the midst of the crowd, yet so lonely. Behind the smiles and the laughter, there are pains and wounds known only to you cause, "no one can really understand", you say. You offer words of encouragement and motivation that you're so much in need of, your heart breaking as you try to provide soothing words that'll mend the heart of others. Sometimes you're not so sure if you'd even make it, everyone you think, is making it big and living in utmost comfort while you're battling with lack and not just enough. You're tempted to compromise your stand, maybe you just didn't hear right. The world can't be too much of his enemy right? You know He said, "slowly but surely" now you're wondering how slow slow really is. You put in your best and it didn't work out the way you wanted so you want to just call it quits and walk away but to what exactly? You're now comparing yourself with your peers forgetting, that everyone is on his...

So today deliberately wanted to turn into a bad day but I didn't let it. I had barely slept for two hours after an all night when my dad woke me up, I was just looking at him like, "You no dey sleep?" He wakes you up in such a way that you hear his voice even from your deepest of dreams and you jerk up with your heart beating times two of its normal rate. Remember I told you he's a disciplinarian. After attending to what needed attention, I tried to get back to my much needed sleep and cramps set in. Really??? Nothing was getting in the way of this my beloved sleep so I hurriedly took some pain killers and snuggled into my pillows, thirty minutes later, I was staring at my ceiling trying to convince myself not being pregnant now was a good thing, Mother Nature had apparently won. So I attempted to read, but the words seemed to jump out of the pages, dancing in circles around my head, just like in Tom and Jerry. Finally, cramps gave way to sleep, two hours later...

Dear future husband, I've been awake trying to imagine what it'd be like to live with one person for the rest of my life. I don't know if I've met you already, I just wonder if you also think about living with me. I watched The Wedding Party for the third time today and it gives me the same feeling each time. I definitely want to have a dream wedding, which girl doesn't? So I beg you please be responsible. I really hope you're doing something tangible with your life cause am trying my best here. The only thing that scared me in that movie was Broda Banky still asking how he could stick to one person for the rest of his life on the morning of his wedding. Pls I'm begging you in the name of God, figure that out before you even engage me. I cannot come and be crying and be running up and down on heels for that matter. But then am also learning it's more than just having a dream wedding but having a happily ever after marriage. I believe it exists but we b...

Growing up in naija gave me a lot of experiences I know I couldn't have probably gotten anywhere else. There were some quite funny ones though and I thought to share some that I remember  with you. Reminiscing on some of them can actually help you have a good laugh. My mom told me just recently that I ate raw pepper when I was about a year and 6months and it got me running round the house with my mouth wide open and I didn't cry o...you can imagine the sight.😅 So,here we go! ◆Welcome to naija, where once rain starts falling, power supply is cut off and if you see the light immediately the rain stops, glory be to God cause just like a friend said they have to dry their wire😂 ◆Welcome to naija, where as an adolescent girl, your mom would tell you not to go close to a boy else you'd get pregnant. Hmm...see me running from boys then. Still wondering how I fell for that.😕 ◆Welcome to naija, where your parents would only realize how dumb you are when your intelligent frien...

There was a time when I was always so afraid of not being accepted and that kept me in my prison for a long time. I couldn't write as I wanted to,couldn't speak as I wanted to,always trying to tone down the intensity of my words to suit the opinion of others. Always wanting to please at my own detriment, overworking myself to meet the deadline of those who wouldn't even bother to meet mine even if I gave them a thousand years. I'd give without restrictions and even get punished for it, I'd cry on my bunk at night so no one would hear. Someone would hurt me and i would try to justify their actions. I stutter a little and this brought about low self esteem, I missed out on a lot of opportunities in high school then cause the words always just happened to cease when they were needed most. After a while, I concluded everyone was out to get me so I raised the gates of my prison wall. No one was going to come in but I wasn't getting out either. Time after time I...

                                           This is to officially welcome back you to KiKi's Lair. We all took time to take in that Trump is the new president, now we must be like Biden and continue being cool. I promise it's gonna be fun all the way. And ohh...never forget KiKi's loves you all and wants to leave the Lair open to all Lions and Lionesses out there who have something to roar about; be it about your personal thoughts on lifestyle, politics, new inventions or just some ideas, thoughts or stories that would warm up our hearts, you want the whole world to know about. Simply send in a mail today through the profile or to email address and you would have your voice beaming out from this platform and your audience commenting about it. Its our Jungle, our world, our den, our lair. Also tell us how you want here to be for you, what you what to read ab...

What can I say about water unclean Oil so dense Or blood spilled to cover the mixture? What can I think of the hard hats The Bulging pipes Or the lies that they disperse? What is my opinion of RPGs The memories it is to wipe Or the cleaning less important than a checkup What can you say about Greed Of fluid money Moving faster than the bullets that secure it What can anyone say about the Outpour of the Niger Of its people Flowing ignorantly into the Sea?

In almost every aspect and point in life, people tend to measure their success and achievements most times to evaluate if goals have been achieved or if effort was worthwhile or to analyse amount of additional work and time needed to achieve the said goals. In this enquiry, several techniques, yardsticks and approaches have been developed and incorporated over time. However the continuous search for an ideal measurement scale/relation/method goes forward to prove that we haven't found that ideal yet. I however have come to measure 'relative success of association' by levels of external and internal pressure to achieve and it's corresponding praise level. I came to this weird method of measuring by association since every single knowledge, idea, fact or understanding we have emanates from external influence or deductions based on same. That is an article for another day but because I have brought you to start considering the truth behind that statement goes a long way ...

"Change". the one major word that has been on the lips of Nigerians since the last election. Funny enough, the election before that had carried the 'Transformation' Logo, then I sit back and ask myself   'Change and Transformation', what's the difference? We claim we are nationals of Nigeria and then want one man to transform or rather, "change" the whole country, I mean a country of about 170 million people. How possible is that? Barack Obama made this profound statement, "Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek." Or country is rapidly entering a state of moral and economic decay, corruption has become a norm while we sit back and wait for 'somebody' who will arise and do something about the undesirable situation. The truth is that while you're hoping for somebody that will catch a vision and summon the co...