Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from September, 2015

Love and Landlord

        I just wanted to get ingredients 4 my breakfast 4rm Mama Dorcas,the woman who sold provisions down d street. As I came out of my gate, everywhere was calm and quiet as expected, most children were probably in school by that time of d morning. As I walked into d store, I greeted Mama Dorcas just as I noticed a dark complexioned pot bellied man standing at a corner in the shop. This wasn't a strange sight at all, though not quite pleasant for that time in the morning as don't actually know what will end up spoiling your day. When he smiled at me he exposed his set of 'it-was-once-white-now-brown-teeth' .Immediately I lost appetite for breakfast that morning. Then he told me he'd be the one to attend to me because he liked fair people...who cares?       I just wanted to get what I came for as soon as possible. So after getting everything I wanted, I proceeded to leave and he called me... "what on earth did he want?" that was the only ques

Pointers that you need to go and Marry

I came across the #GoAndMarry trend on twitter and decided to do a compilation of pointers based on different cultures and characteristics that you are running out of time to marry or that simply you are getting older and should be proud of it  ( Should you?)  The first on my series is Nigerian movies so while the tailor is taking your measurements for the next ashoebi you are partaking in, sit back and ask yourself Why haven't I gotten married yet? If you have watched any of these Nigerian movies, you need to go and marry ASAP 1. Living in Bondage 2. Taboo 3. Nneka the pretty serpent Or any other 1990s blockbuster in their category From the faces of the actors alone, You should have known how old you have gotten by now. Even Kanayo O. Kanayo looks like an eligible bachelor here. Your case should be worse if you did see any of these movies on the black and white boxed up television. Just kidding though, stay at home until your father puts your name and picture