KiKi's LAIR

In the midst of the crowd, yet so lonely. Behind the smiles and the laughter, there are pains and wounds known only to you cause, "no one can really understand", you say. You offer words of encouragement and motivation that you're so much in need of, your heart breaking as you try to provide soothing words that'll mend the heart of others. Sometimes you're not so sure if you'd even make it, everyone you think, is making it big and living in utmost comfort while you're battling with lack and not just enough. You're tempted to compromise your stand, maybe you just didn't hear right. The world can't be too much of his enemy right? You know He said, "slowly but surely" now you're wondering how slow slow really is. You put in your best and it didn't work out the way you wanted so you want to just call it quits and walk away but to what exactly? You're now comparing yourself with your peers forgetting, that everyone is on his...

So today deliberately wanted to turn into a bad day but I didn't let it. I had barely slept for two hours after an all night when my dad woke me up, I was just looking at him like, "You no dey sleep?" He wakes you up in such a way that you hear his voice even from your deepest of dreams and you jerk up with your heart beating times two of its normal rate. Remember I told you he's a disciplinarian. After attending to what needed attention, I tried to get back to my much needed sleep and cramps set in. Really??? Nothing was getting in the way of this my beloved sleep so I hurriedly took some pain killers and snuggled into my pillows, thirty minutes later, I was staring at my ceiling trying to convince myself not being pregnant now was a good thing, Mother Nature had apparently won. So I attempted to read, but the words seemed to jump out of the pages, dancing in circles around my head, just like in Tom and Jerry. Finally, cramps gave way to sleep, two hours later...

If I tried to measure his love I'd run out of tapes to roll If I even attempted to imagine it I'd exhaust the capacity of human thoughts. So I'll just wade and bask in volumes of it Till am so far beneath to wander away. In it every fault, mistake and wrong is washed away And even if I tried to pull away It'd draw me back with force Calvary's sacrifice It has never failed even in apparent defeat It has never left even in severe loneliness It has never, not because it won't but because it can't. This knowing brings peace and joy Even in moments of brokenness and undoings. It forever stays as long as I want it And I want it now and forever.

Deep in the forests where the feet of man never dared to dread was were they abode, so creepy even fear itself shuddered. With grotesque creatures visible yet invisible for only those with the eyes of their spirit could see them. In circles the selected moved gyrating to the beats, hands and legs moving in rhythm to sounds created by whom they could not see. With the leaves in their mouth, no word was uttered but the language of the beyond echoed in their ears louder than their own heartbeats. As they moved gracefully, sweat glistening on their bodies, one by one they came to the middle of the circle laying down their treasures, beautiful destinies discovered and shining stars of the innocent for no tainted was worthy of the oracles. Soon the night was gone and the dance was done. One by one they transformed, flying away to humanity. But perhaps the drums had been too loud and the night too dark for them to hear or see the ones who had kept watch offering incense which had risen up...

After listening to Cohbams Asuquo give this talk at a TEDx session, I realized I needed this gift. Now, not physically as you may mischieviously think but psychologically. He talked about going to the mall to get something with his wife and having exactly what he wanted in mind, because he was blind he couldn't afford the luxury of checking out and buying other things but his wife on the other hand wanted this, that and so on. He then made an application to our everyday lives with this illustration by which I could totally relate to.  How many times had I wanted to work at something, to focus on just one thing and gotten distracted by so many other things that probably weren't even worth it in the long run? Many a times, we get carried away by things that we know deep down we do not need but just succumb to for sheer pleasure. We need to understand the necessity of being blind to certain things, certain voices, certain pleasures and side attractions if we really want to achi...

Dear future husband, I've been awake trying to imagine what it'd be like to live with one person for the rest of my life. I don't know if I've met you already, I just wonder if you also think about living with me. I watched The Wedding Party for the third time today and it gives me the same feeling each time. I definitely want to have a dream wedding, which girl doesn't? So I beg you please be responsible. I really hope you're doing something tangible with your life cause am trying my best here. The only thing that scared me in that movie was Broda Banky still asking how he could stick to one person for the rest of his life on the morning of his wedding. Pls I'm begging you in the name of God, figure that out before you even engage me. I cannot come and be crying and be running up and down on heels for that matter. But then am also learning it's more than just having a dream wedding but having a happily ever after marriage. I believe it exists but we b...